*A note from the editor*
Many people have been asking why the 12 Days of Christmas stopped after 6 days. It has nothing to do with the Content King going to a ski-house for New Year’s Eve and being too drunk and/or hungover for the past 5 days to use his brain. It has even less to do with the fact that many fans did not appreciate his talents and borderline hated the videos. And the fact that almost no one even went to the YouTube Channel was 100% not a factor at all.
Legally, I cannot release the full details of what happened. All I will say is that the fault lies completely with the Board. A group of incredibly influential investors attempted to meddle in content and force us to publish posts we were not comfortable with. Just know that your Content King refused to bend the knee and he never will. And we’ll leave it at that. And again, this had nothing to do with laziness or absolutely none of our fans liking the idea, concept, or execution.
Hopefully, we’ll return with the remaining 6 days of Christmas next year. Or maybe we’ll do a 6 days of Christmas in July or something. Honestly, I don’t plan beyond my next meal so I don’t really know what to tell you.
If this is your first time here, check out the first 6 days. And subscribe to the YouTube Channel to watch them all together. And make sure you comment how much you love the Content King and think he is smart, handsome and funny.
While he may appear to have everything a person could possibly want, the Content King details his many wishes for Christmas 2019 in a performance that oozes raw emotion and masculine strength.
The Content King showcases his incredible acting range in this shot for shot remake of the iconic pizza delivery scene in Home Alone, which is like 80% a Christmas movie. All bullet sounds are original please credit.
Proving once again that he will go to great lengths to reference his Little League career whenever possible, the Content King combines soothing vocals with sharp rhythmic tones to recreate the timeless classic of a poor boy who gives our newborn savior easily his worst birthday gift ever.
Most people don’t know this but cultures all around the world celebrate Christmas – not just America. Today we pay homage to Jose Feliciano, a top 5 blind singer of all time and inventor of Feliz Navidad. All singing and guitar sounds are performed by Content King and sometimes the actual version when his voice got tired.
Set against the background of a whistling performance equal parts sensual and shrill, the Content King explores the history of holiday conifers and exposes Big Christmas Tree for their many crimes.
Day 1: Where Are You Christmas?
The Content King’s rich baritone embraces this holiday classic and caresses its subtleties with a warm blanket of vibratto and staccato that is equal parts tantalizing and emotionally devastating.
I’M SORRY BUT WHAT IS THIS?
MERRY CHRISTMAS LOYAL WRDIES. What a year 2018 has been. Our hard-working staff at Work Retire Die headquarters has posted over 77 articles this year, made more than 249 memes and paid hundreds of dollars they don’t really have to WordPress.com for site features they’ll never use. We’ve grown to nearly 100 email subscribers and 2,400 Instagram followers, generating more than 16k visitors and 40k page-views in just 365 days. We are without a doubt the biggest website on the Internet, closely followed by Google and Addictinggames.com.
And it’s all thanks to you, loyal WRDies. The heroes who take a break from your not that busy day to read our blogs, like our memes, and tell everyone you’ve ever met about the hottest brand on the Internet. If haven’t been doing that, please stop reading now, because you don’t deserve what’s coming next.
You may be asking yourself – how can WRD get any bigger? How much more successful can one man and one site possibly become? Well congrats on being a complete idiot because guess what – we are officially pivoting to video. Suck on that Zuckerberg.
For the next 12 days, we will be releasing the 12 Days of Work Retire Christmas Video Series. What’s that, you ask? Well wait a goddam second and let me explain. Each day, we’ll be releasing a video featuring the Content King singing, whistling and/or performing a dramatic reading of timeless Christmas content. One video a day. For 12 days. Or until the Content King has a mental breakdown from carrying the weight of an entire nation on his shoulder.
Why are you doing the 12 Days of Christmas after Christmas, you ask? Because I honestly just thought about it so leave me alone. If you don’t like it, start your own blog.
This is just a taste of what’s going to come. Our team is growing every day and we’re planning to release one video a month, mainly comedy shorts and sketches that will make you laugh, cry and Venmo me most of your life savings out of respect. And of course, you’ll have the same blogs that you love and read every night before bed.