It’s a time honored tradition in the summer to leave for a weekend trip on a Thursday night and “work remotely” Friday from the beach, lake or wherever you find yourself. It’s a great way to to save vacation days and also have the least productive day of all time. People barely work in the summer to begin with and Fridays are a wash even if you’re in the office. As long as you answer 2 emails and get on one call when you’re working from home, you’ve done your due diligence.
Here at WRD, it is our solemn honor to make sure you know all the facts about working remotely – the perks, the pitfalls, the risks and the rewards. No need to thank us or compensate us financially, but it would definitely be a nice gesture.
As such, we are proud to present….
working from home – the pros & cons
Since you’re not going in to the office, feel free to wear whatever your little heart desires. You don’t even have to shower and brush your teeth if you don’t want to. Add that on top of not having to commute, you are getting at least an extra hour of sleep. If you’re a girl who does like skincare and straightens their hair or something, it might even be two hours. Get those REM cycles in baby!
Pros: Working in Your Underwear
When you have a body as incredible as mine, it’s borderline a sin to ever cover it up. Plus, clothes are dumb and were invented by God in the Garden of Eden to make Adam feel guilty for being naked. Look it up.
Cons: No One Can See Your Sick Body / Shirts
See above. Only bummer about not going in to the office is I can’t flaunt my cool shirts and fit upper torso.
Remember the golden rule of working life – ALWAYS poop on the clock.
Pros: Better toilet paper
Corporate America has a lot of cool perks but toilet paper is not one of them. Get this weak ass single ply out of my face. No office in America has better toilet paper than the Downy in my apartment. I’ll poop at home thank you very much.
Cons: Easier to clog the toilet
The best part about Corporate America is how strong those goddam industrial toilets are. As someone who generally clog at least once toilet a week at my apartment, this kind of flushing power is a big deal.
When you work from home, you realize how little work you actually do. There may be days where you actually have to do some work, in which case, I pray for you. This job is how you pay all your bills but you shouldn’t have to do it 5 days a week. That’s not right.
Pros: Complete freedom
Take as long as you want responding to emails and IMs. No one can come by your desk to harass you and ask if you saw the email they sent literally 3 minutes ago. Don’t stress about browsing other sites or doing some online shopping. Throw on the TV for some nice background noise, lie down on the couch, and respond to one email an hour so people know you’re doing stuff.
Official Top Five TV Shows to Have on in the Background While You Work
- The Office
- Parks & Rec
Cons: It’s kind of boring and you don’t have a monitor
At a certain point, you miss shooting the shit with your buds at the office. Even worse, you might not get to flirt with your work crush who actually hates you and finds you to be obnoxious.
The no monitor life is pretty tough, especially if you’re a little Excel boy who cranks away like a monkey all day long. Don’t really have a solve for you. It’ll probably be fine because everything can wait until Monday.
If you thought you zoned out during meetings, just wait until you take a conference call from your bed at 2 pm on a Friday afternoon.
Pros: You don’t have to pay attention at all
Your basic responsibilities on a work from home conference call are as follows:
- Dial in.
- State your name and say you’re here.
- Go on mute and scroll through your phone.
- Say ‘thanks. have a good weekend everyone.’ at the end of the call.
Cons: You might fall asleep
My friend once worked remotely from the Jersey Shore on a Friday after we went extremely hard the night before. He fell asleep in the middle of a conference call, which is pretty bad considering people asked him several direct questions.
Drinking on the job is literally the entire point of working from home.
Pros: You can get drunk at noon
Nothing better than finishing your last thing for the day, cracking a beer during lunch, and getting the weekend started early. You’ve earned this break. You worked for 11 straight minutes at one point – that’s a big deal. We’re all very proud of you pal.
Cons: Drunk emailing
You may jump the gun and start drinking a little too early and end up having to still work. You may send an email with 3 exclamation points too many or address someone as ‘bro.’ Please don’t drink and Outlook. This is how lives are ruined.